It’s a great game with predominantly great characters, though there are some that are better than others. Some of them just really irk me, and from what I understand, that’s a pretty universal experience. It’s like, why are you even here?! So without further ado, here are the absolute worst villagers that can be found in Pelican Town.
5. George
I have nothing against the elderly. But I do have something against people who take being elderly as an excuse to be persnickety. George is mean, bitter, and seems to have a grudge against the player for no reason for a weirdly long time. His heart events are fine, but he takes a really long time to warm up to the player. This is a picky thing, but it also grinds my gears that his easiest loved gift is leeks. I like a good leek myself, but all I can picture is him eating one like a piece of celery. Maybe that’s why he’s so angry all the time?
4. Lewis
Here’s a hot take: the mayor of Pelican Town is a coward. Firstly, he’s totally dishonest about his relationship with Marnie. But secondly, he’s canonically been in a position of power for over twenty years. Who runs totally unopposed for that long? Evil dictators. I rest my case. He’s also super mean to the youth. During one of the heart events, he yells at Sam for skateboarding. He seems to hate the youth, which is rough, considering Pelican Town’s average age seems to be sub-thirty. He doesn’t speak for the people, that’s for sure!
3. Marnie
Don’t get me wrong, Marnie is sweet. The problem is, she’s also super boring. The most exciting thing about Marnie is her relationship with Lewis, which doesn’t cut it. Remember, dear reader, that this list is the worst characters in Stardew Valley, not the meanest. As far as I’m concerned, her entire role in the game can be summed up to being able to sell you animals. And frankly, if that role just went to Shane, it would help make him more interesting. There’s just not very much there!
2. Haley
Oh my goodness, don’t get me started on Haley. Alright, fine, you’re right – I’m already started. Haley is so MEAN! I know she gets better as you get to higher heart levels with her, but all she does at the beginning is gripe and complain. “This town is so small, it sucks”, she says. Okay, well, Zuzu City is right there! Go whine there, whiny baby. She’s the mean girl trope and I just don’t like that.
1. Shane
Urgh… Shane. I’ve given Shane a chance, really, I have. I’ve even married him. He’s an interesting character, I’ll give you that. But he’s such a jerk, and his post-marriage dialogue is hot garbage. He’s rude, burping a lot and commenting that it tastes like pizza rolls (ew!), and he isn’t very sweet to the farmer even though they’re supposed to be his spouse. He’s even really anti-farmer right as you meet him, acting like he’s taking it personally when you so much as talk to him. Honestly, he’s just a tool all around, buyer beware.
