From useless characters to straight-up annoying NPCs, I’ve decided to make a list of the 10 Skyrim characters that may as well not be in the game(or at least deserve questioning what they’re really doing…) I’ve ranked the most useless characters as well as characters that make you want to murder a kitten in despair when they talk or move. Keep in mind that these are very personal opinions, so you might disagree with some of them. In any case I’ve checked online forums to confirm that I’m hopefully not too biased and there are many people that seem to agree here. I guess with that said let’s dive in!
10. Nelkir
Do you hate useless characters? What about entitled children? If you answered “yes” to both questions, then you probably despise Nelkir. This child has a serious problem which shows that his father did a crappy job at raising him. How can the son of a Jarl act in such a way towards travelers? I hate being called a bootlicker by wannabe communist children in online forums, so I’m not putting up with the same crap when playing Skyrim!
9. Braith
This girl is by far the most disrespectful child in the game. She doesn’t even show fear when speaking to the Dragonborn – what’s up with that? She just wanders the streets disrespecting adults and being an overall distasteful human being. I have the feeling that Bethesda created Skyrim to make us hate children and slow down the world’s overpopulation. They seem to be succeeding, as per the comments of other TES players show.
8. Olfina Gray-Mane
Olfina Gray-Mane does nothing but go on about how women are superior to men in every way, but she’s not even an activist – she’s just a random citizen of Skyrim that feels the need to direct her anger towards the player. She’s definitely not the worst character on the list, but it seems fair to say there’s no point in listening to her gibberish.
7. That Annoying Chicken in Riverwood
If you think the conflict between Skyrim and The Empire is bad, wait till you see what happens when you attack Riverwood’s roaming chicken. This animal, when killed, will unleash the rage of all citizens of the town. This prompts a murderous rampage that will probably end up in death unless you swiftly run away and never look back. I’m not sure if Bethesda intended for the chicken to be the cause of such a triggerable event(most likely). But if there’s one thing I know, it’s that you’re going to go mad trying to either run away from the murderous townsfolks or trying to slay them all to the ground.
6. Children in General
You know what? Screw it. This list is going to be filled with children NPCs if this keeps going, so I’m just adding “children” as a useless character. Not only are most children in Skyrim completely useless, many of them are ill-behaved and annoying and rude. The worst part of all(and probably what makes them such useless characters) is that you can’t kill them. Bethesda probably thought that would be immoral, I guess? Who are they to judge how we scold children anyway? Children are some of the most annoying characters in the game and I’ve yet to think of a strong use case for what they add to the gameplay.
5. Hermaeus Mora
I’m really thankful that we only need to speak to Hermaeus Mora once in the main quest. He’s as useless as he is annoying. All he does is talk and get on my nerves. I’m sure you either agree with me or you’re a sociopath – there’s no middle ground in between. One would think that such an annoying character would at least have skippable dialogue, right? Nope. You have to listen to Hermaeus Mora go through his sermon if you want to complete the game. There’s no other way around it. I’d suggest you turn on some music from Spotify or something if you need to interact with this lunatic.
4. Lydia
Lydia has the best of intentions, but she’s completely useless. I dare you to go through a full Skyrim playthrough with her at your side and having her survive over five quests – I guarantee you won’t be able to do it. How can a veteran fighter be so bad at her job? She’s quite decent with a sword in her hands, but the damn warrior will walk towards every trap in the game almost assuredly. If you want a companion that is sure to make your life more difficult than ever and only serve as a meat shield, then Lydia is your go-to follower. God knows why you would want that given so many other incredible options. But hey, to each their own.
3. Delphine
Delphine is on this list for two reasons: the first is how completely useless and annoying she is. But the second and most important reason is that she’s the person who sets you on your way to kill Paarthunax. Man, does that quest completely push me off the deep end. You need to kill one of the best characters in the game just to get the help of an order that might as well not exist? C’mon. I hate Delphine and what she made me do.
2. Nazeem
One of life’s finest pleasures is decapitating Nazeem. He’s by far one of the Elder Scrolls’ most hated characters ever, with people of all playstyles despising this man equally. Imagine creating a character that has all the negative attributes that you hate from most human beings, and you get Nazeem. I’m not sure how Skyrim would be if he simply wasn’t added. This man has somehow managed to get under my skin far more than any other character in the game, except one – the top pick of my list.
1. Belethor
Belethor is everything wrong with modern salespeople embodied into a Skyrim character. Sure, I might despise him more than Nazeem because I’ve worked in sales before. But man does it annoy me how he simply refuses to acknowledge anything you do for him or his store’s economy. This dude shows little-to-no interest in your presence. I always avoid his store whenever I can. He does nothing but complain and serve as a shopkeeper – pretty much the almost complete definition of a useless character if I’ve ever seen one.
